When I was in High School, each year the Senior Class would produce "The Senior Musical". This wasn't just for the theater crowd, but something just about everyone in the graduating class participated in. It was a bonding experience to strengthen the ties, and a celebration of the end of our high school careers. A professional director was brought in and auditions were held. I was definitely not a theater person, but all my friends were doing it so I auditioned. I can't sing, and I can't dance and I went out there and phoned it in. And not only did I stink, but when the director casually asked me "you're just auditioning because your friends are, right?" I replied "yes". And as expected I got cut and ended up on the set crew.
As I watched my friends perform, some well, some not so well, I was disappointed, I would have liked to have been out there. But I half-assed it and so I wasn't. I learned a valuable life lesson and its message has stayed with me these following decades, if you are going to bother to do something, give it your full effort. It's a lesson I've struggled with. Some things just don't seem worth putting in that 100%. Whether it's because I've felt they are trivial, or I'm good at it so I don't have to, or because I'm bad at the skill or task and want that cop-out. The ability to say "yeah, I stunk, but I didn't give it my all and that's why."
But, I've tried to be mindful, to give it my all and have succeeded at doing so a fair bit. I've also still phoned some things in, life lessons are hard, that's the point. I've also tried to teach my kids to give their full effort. Recently my daughter joined the lacrosse team at her school. She was assigned to defense and wasn't happy about it. As we talked about this, I said. "you have two choices. You can slack off and not be very good at defense and hope to get moved or maybe benched. Or you can learn your role, learn new skills and contribute to your team however you can." There really is no choice. And in her first game, she was a bit lost, but gave it her full effort.
My son is learning this lesson as well. Recently he received a grade that was not what he felt he deserved, but due to "poor" class participation. So each class he waits for his moment and asks a pointed question of the teacher. He is giving his full effort in this class.
And for me, I recently took part in the Crossfit Open, a worldwide competition to find "the fittest athletes on earth". The top 20 in each age group go to the annual Crossfit Games, a really big deal. I came in 23rd. Was I disappointed? Sure, who wouldn't be? But my disappointment was far overshadowed by my pride and satisfaction knowing I gave it my full effort. I left nothing out there. 23rd was exactly the best I could do and that feels great.
Our kids will have their own life lessons to learn, but if I can impart some of my learnings and make their life a bit better, then I think I'm doing my job. And hopefully give my full effort to my role as a parent.
